In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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