I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Randomize