But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
Randomize
