Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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