we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
You pole danced in your parka.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
Randomize
