is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
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