I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
Randomize