yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
Randomize
