we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
Just took my morning after pill in the library
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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