I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
Randomize
