just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
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