girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
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