Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
Randomize
