woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
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