so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
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