College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
