Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
You know what would have been funny if we got arrested last night? The inventory search of the lock box:\n\nContents:\n1 work ID\n1 33 round Glock magazine\n1 set of keys\n1 vibrator\n2 bags fruit snacks\n1 parking hang tag
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
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