covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
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