I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
Randomize