Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
Randomize
