Me. At least after what I've been through.
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
Randomize
