i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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