I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
Randomize
