Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
