So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
