the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
It's 6 am and I've spent the last few hours searching for a cork screw or suitable substitute. You had none. Incidentally, I finally opened this bottle of wine, but owe you a new meat sticky thing with those two prongs. Sobriety is not good for me. Or your utensils.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
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