Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
Randomize