I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
