So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
Randomize
