I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
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