Plan B is the new Plan A
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
Randomize
