Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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