Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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