You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
Randomize
