Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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