That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Randomize
