Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize