Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
Randomize
