i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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