Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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