Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
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