Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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