on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
