Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
Randomize
