please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
Randomize
