East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
