Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
I informed him that we had less than 5 minutes left to live, and his first words were "I'm trying to think of a good They Might Be Giants quip"
Randomize
