Me. At least after what I've been through.
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
