her vagina looked like bernie madoff
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
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