I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
