real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
This is my life. Enjoy the view
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
try to milk me bitch
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