He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
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